It's perfectly okay

Updated: May 4, 2020

So I'm starting this blog during an interesting time in 2020...#quarantine! *Insert balloon pops* How many of you are celebrating by eating all the snacks? Let's be honest, it sucks. People have lost jobs, we can't see our friends, we can't do most anything outside. But somewhere in the long melded day-nights we have to believe that this will end and to keep on mining the small joys nestled between. Looking forward to when we can all hang out again, buy stuff just because, and having a conversation with someone new for a change.

Lately, I'm hearing about people enjoying nostalgic treasures in their homes like vintage cassette tapes and old journals. I've always kept journals throughout my life, as a way to work through my anxieties and #depression. Big reveal...I suffer from dysthymia, a mild form of depression that lasts for years and in my case is always lurking around the corner. But the thing that helped me a lot was keeping journals and sketchbooks. And to be honest, it's the main reason why I'm creative, because of the need to have beauty in my life when it felt like there was none outside. So I looked for it inside.

In an ironic way, depression is what drives me forward.

I'm not always ambitious. There will be times when I could forge ahead against all odds to accomplish something and then come to a screeching halt because I've misplaced where I put the meaning. This quarantine has been a dance of ambition and ambivalence. And you have to just believe that it's okay. It's okay that you're taking this time not to finalize your business plan, or get in the best shape ever. It's okay that all you want to do is eat chips and sleep in because like everyone else, we are all coping with uncertainty. So here's a top 5 list of coping skills when I'm not feeling my best:

  1. Take small breaks in between

  2. Look up, literally and shift your gaze somewhere else

  3. Walk outside for some fresh air

  4. Make yourself a treat

  5. Remember you've already come a long way

I'm here for you. We can all dance to the rhythm of the blues and small successes together. I wore real pants today. Wherever you are at, it's good enough.